Cup Half Full

I am usually a very optimistic person. Lately I have noticed that I am slowly becoming a cup half empty person. This realization took me by surprise. I am not sure why but I do have some ideas why this is happening.  Here is what I think....

• The traveling life style is starting to take a toll on me.
• I have found where I really want to settle down and we can't right now.
• New York can make anyone hard and cold.
• It is winter time in the North East.

These are a few of the reasons why I think my positive out look is slipping through my fingers. Now that I have an idea of what is bringing me down, how am I going to turn it around!! I really need to be "glass half full" again. I am a firm believer that happiness to an extent is something you have to choose. Yes, we all have circumstances that our out of our control. Yes, we all have things that we really want and don't have. Yes, we all think "if only a,b,and c, then we would be happy".  Guess what?! None of that matters!!! If you want to be happy CHOOSE HAPPINESS everyday, in every moment. The best way to choose happiness is to focus on the positive, focus on what you do have, focus on what is going right, focus on what you love, focus on being grateful to the Lord for EVERYTHING.

Now to take my own word and use them....

• Our traveling (Colt's job) has taken us to so many wonderful places. We have gone to and seen things as a family that would have not been possible any other way. A sunrise on the east coat and sunset on the west coast in the same month!  From alligators swimming in the Everglades to a haunted prison in Idaho and so many other wonderful places. The memories we are making are unbelievable!!
• How lucky am I that I have had the chance to live in so many places in the country? SO LUCKY!! I have made friends all over the country. I got to find my dream cities not only one but TWO place where I would love to live. Even if that can't happen right now I did get to live there even if just for a few months. 
• New York has taught me something about myself. That I do have a voice and at times it needs to loud so that I can be heard and so people know that I, nor my family will be trampled on. My kids have learned that if something or someone is bothering you then it is okay to say something.
• Yes, winter is cold and dark and wet, but we have a warm safe place to be. We have lived through Colorado winters so we know that we CAN do it. IF we need to go out we have clothes, coats, scarves, gloves and shoes to keep us warm and dry. I can suck it up and smile as I watch the kids with joy in their eyes at the site of snow. 

Starting right now I choose HAPPINESS! This next 6 months in New York City will be AMAZING, why, because I say so!!!

This year Malayna helped make
Thanksgiving dinner!

Dinner is ready!

Time to decorate our little Christmas tree! Our first "real" tree.

My sweet hubby. This lady didn't have enough money for the gifts in her cart,
just as she was telling the cashier to put a few things back, Colt gave me "the look", so I smiled and nodded.
He then stepped in front of her and swiped his card, and said Merry Christmas.
She was speechless, she tried to hand him all the cash in her hand, but he refused.
The cashier and this lady had tears in their eyes and huge smiles on their faces.
 I love Colt's heart. 

Ready for church.

Made it to church early!!!

Took the kids out even in the snow. This was huge for me!

                                      Click here to see a video of the kids in the Primary Program

Until next time. Love you C,M,B,C,E, and L!!

PARADES!!

     We have gone to 2 parades in New York City now, both in November.  First we went to the Veteran's Day Parade. Just today we went to the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade.

     Veteran's day is kind of a big deal to our family. We have many family members and friends that our Veterans, most of all my favorite Veteran, my hubby Colt. That morning while Colt was still sleeping(he was working nights) I got the kids ready to head to Manhattan. Right before we left Colt decided to get up and come along. We got there about an hour before the parade started. When we came out of the subway there were lots of people. We looked around and found a space open for our family with a front row view, but it was across the street. We had to work our way around the crowd and through a maze of street barricades but we made it and got settled in before it got full. We waited for around for about an hour before the parade started. Then here came the parade!!! The military bands were so fun to hear. We watched groups of amazing men and women take the oath of enlistment for every branch of service. We saw floats, balloons, horses, service men and woman, cars, motorcycles, wounded vets, families of veterans, and people all around were passing out flags, stickers, and buttons. It was fun to see all the vets around us that were giving and receiving salutes while watching the parade. Most of all is was fun to see the smiles on the faces of the vets that we personally thanked.

     Today we went to the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. Let me start with a bit of back story. While we were still in San Diego we found out that we were going to NYC next. Before we looked for a place to stay I booked a hotel for the parade (of course this was most important), it was close to the middle of the parade and a block off the parade route. Last week I decided to look for rooms again. Turned out there were some cancellations at a hotel that was on the parade route and only a block from Macy's! When I made this reservation we knew our room did not have a parade view, but we talked with the front desk and they assured us that we could watch the parade from the street in front of the hotel, which sounded perfect(close to our bathroom, and we don't have to be out there that early)! We got to Manhattan on Wednesday afternoon. The weather was awful, rain/snow and only 30*. We checked out Manhattan Mall, and ate lunch before we went to our hotel. We checked into our hotel around 2:30 pm, we were cold, wet and tired. We dried out the kid's clothes and watched movies. Soon it was time for dinner. Colt and I got all bundled up again and headed out to get the kids dinner. We found this place that was kind of like a to go buffet. We filled up a couple boxes and headed back to the hotel. We fed the kids and got them settled in bed. Colt and I then headed back out. We went to check out Macy's across the street. It was amazing! It was huge! It was unbelievable! Colt and I had a blast walking around that store and seeing the cute window displays and seeing the iconic green road where the parade passes in front of Macy's in herald square(what you see on tv)! After we were back in the hotel with the kids we watched some more tv(we haven't watched tv in 2 months so this was a treat). Finally the kids were asleep. I couldn't sleep, I was like a little kid on Christmas Eve. I have watched this parade every year on tv and now I was going to see it in person!! I stood at our window and watched what I could see of the preparations for the next day. I finally fell asleep around 11:30 pm. I was awoken by marching bands rehearsing in the street around 2:30 am, that was it, I was too excited to go back to sleep, IT WAS ALREADY TOMORROW!!! Lindy was woken by the bands at about 4:00 am. "I hear a song.", was the first thing she said in our dark room. By 6 am I couldn't wait anymore. I bundled Lindy and I up and we headed to the street!! We got down there and the police told us that the street view in front of our hotel was blocked off and nobody could stay there, but we could sit across the street. Okay no big deal, across the street. I set up the camping chair and Lindy and I got a great front row seat! I called Colt and told him the new location. After about 45 min the police came and told all the people that were sitting where we were that they were now going to close this section of the street too! What?! They told us we had to move a block north, which wasn't a big deal but the fact that we lost our front row seats was a big deal!!! I was mad, but there was nothing I could do about except swear at the police(which, sadly I did). Lindy and I moved up the street and found a place that was just ok :/ it was already covered with people. I called Colt and told him where we were now, and told him to hurry because it was filling fast. He and the rest of the kids got there around 7 am. 

     We were freezing! The weather was still awful. While we were waiting for the parade to start by us, protesters decided to cause a scene. We watched as the NYPD arrested 6 or so protesters. The kids were restless and freezing. Then before the parade got to us a parade worker came by to tell us that we were in the "quite zone" which means the bands can not play here because the "noise" will interfere with the broadcasters 4 blocks away! WHAT?! There was no moving spots this time, there was nowhere else to go! Finally the parade made it to us at 10:15 am, more than 4 hours after we got out there. Once it started all the adults that were SITTING in front of us STOOD up, then none of our kids could see anything. Then as our kids tried to squeeze in to nooks and crannies on the floor to see something the ADULTS would purposefully move so they could block the kids. Colt and I took turns holding the little ones up to see. Then a kind woman let Malayan stand in front of her and Bobby sat at her feet. Luckily Lindy had fallen asleep in the stroller and had no idea she was missing anything(I guess that was one plus to being in the quite zone). About an hour into the parade the same rude adults in front of us started SMOKING and blowing it in the direction where Malayan and Bobby were standing next to them, Malayan was coughing and Bobby was trying to cover his nose with his coat. We asked them if they really had to smoke right here where there were kids everywhere. Other people around seconded our thoughts and also started to say something. Then all of a sudden this guy(that was smoking) turns around and started yelling at me and telling me to shut up and that my voice was annoying. I started yelling right back (not my finest moment), Colt then started yelling at the guy to turn back around then another lady next to us started yelling for the smoker guy to stop being disrespectful. He didn't smoke anymore. About another hour later Eva had to go to the bathroom, there was none close(because we got kicked out of our original 2 spots). We gathered all the kids and our stuff and tried to get to the closest cross street to get off the parade route. We got to one end and it was blocked and they wouldn't let us through, even though I tried to explain that I had a kid that was going to pee her pants. I lost it when the arrogant s.o.b had the nerve to tell me, "sounds like a planing failure to me,". I said some choice words that I NEVER say and called him a few names, then pushed on his barrier and told the kids to turn around(oh my, what is New York doing to me). We fought are way through the crowd and to the other end, we could not find a restroom(none of the stores would let us use them). Finally with tears in her eyes, the family made a semi circle to cover us and I put a diaper on her. By this time I was done. We just kept walking in the sleet, and cold until we got to the subway. 

     We caught the train, and headed home. 

      I was so sad on the train home, I held back tears. I wasn't so much sad that it was a complete bust, I was sad because I let the negativity and the disappointment of the day get to me, because I sank to the same rude level as the people around me and because I was not the best example of optimism and peace to my children.

     Here are a few tips if you decided you want to go see the Macy's Thanksgiving parade in person...

• If you want to see the "parade" that you watch on tv, don't go. Just watch it on tv.
• Watch it from a hotel room(bookings are up to a year in advance). Don't stay at the Courtyard Marriott on 6th and 35th, unless you have a parade view room. The regular room is not worth the price, because you can't even stand by your hotel for parade time.
• If you want to really view and experience the parade be at least 8-10 blocks north of Herald Square.
• Get there early like 4-5 hours before the parade. If you are not in the front row you wont see much.
• Bring something to sit on, and be prepared to tell everyone that this is your spot!
• Bring plenty of snacks and drinks, and things to keep you busy while you wait (especially if you have kids).
• Dress warm! You can always take off a coat, but it sucks to not have one when you need one.
• Don't have to use the bathroom! It wont happen. 

    If we ever decided to do this parade again it will be from a hotel room near Columbus circle. Most likely the Trump Towers(going to have to save up for a long time).

    We will have our turkey dinner tomorrow. We have no desire to leave our cozy little apartment for awhile after the kind of day we had. At least I can say I went to the Macy's Parade. 

Until next time. I love you C, M, B, C, E, and L

Freezing our butts off at the parade.

Since we were not in the front row

balloons are all we could see.

On the subway going home.

Mommy Overload

As a full time stay at home mom and homeschooler, there are times when I wish I could just run away. I don't mean forever but maybe for a day or two.
Don't get me wrong I love my family and I love being a mom. It just starts to get draining when you do the same thing day in and day out, for weeks or months or years at a time.
I have been a mom for almost 11 years now and have been a homeschool mom for the past 4 or 5 years now(not sure the years have sort of blurred together).
Since being a mom I have learned so much about myself: I can't handle puke. I really don't like Dora(how many times does she need to say the same thing, trust me I have to do that enough already). I am not a morning person or night owl, but I can be if I absolutely have to. I like need at least 8 hours of sleep to function well. I hate feet but not if they belong to a 3 year old or younger. I love toddler bellies, and belly laughs. These are just a few, but there are so, so many more.
We all know the mommy duties, cooking (3 meals and at least 2 snacks per day), Cleaning everything(bathrooms, bed rooms, kitchens, living rooms, family rooms, toy rooms, closets, home offices, and everything else I can't think of right now), and laundry(our huge family has at least 7-10 loads per week). Lets not forget managing the family finances, play dates, child care and above all a marriage. If we some how manage it, throw in being a daughter, a sister and a friend.
Now for me as a homeschool mom add to the above, lesson plans(for grades k-7th grade in different subjects), teaching(all grades and subjects), grading, my own learning and research, and throw in overwhelming doubts and feelings of failure on all levels.
You see this is what I do day in and day out. Most of the time I love it and most of the time it is no problem, but at times I feel full of mommy overload. Like at any minute this mommy is going to drop and be down for the count.
Thankfully I have an amazing husband that recognizes "mommy overload" (when I start being short tempered and cry about everything). He often steps in and tells me to go take some time to myself. I love this and hate this at the same time. I feel guilty for not being able to do it all, and do it all well, all the time. I feel happy that he cares and is perceptive enough to take over(at least for a little bit). I feel weird about leaving my "job". I have mixed feelings about alone time, I know I need it but I would rather have "me time" with another adult that I love, usually with a BFF, that also lives my kind of life(aka Zo).
Lately I can tell that I am getting close to mommy overload. So I am writing this so that one day when my daughters read this, that they can know (not only that their mom is amazing ;)) that it is, okay. It is okay to feel overwhelmed doing the job that is the most important, that is is okay to feel overwhelmed doing what you love, that it is okay to take time for yourselves, that it is okay to need a break, that it is okay to to talk about how you are feeling, and that it is okay to try your best(even if you didn't make it, try again).
When my sons read this one day I want them to know (not only that their mom is amazing ;)) that it is okay. It is okay for your wife to need help, it is okay that your wife is tired, it is okay for you to step in when your wife needs you(even if she doesn't ask), its okay to for you to feel overwhelmed with the duties of providing for a family, it is okay to need your wife, it is okay to try your best(even if you didn't reach it, try again).
This is something I read often (Because She Is a Mother)
"Do the best you can through these years, but whatever else you do, cherish that role that is so uniquely yours and for which heaven itself sends angels to watch over you and your little ones. Husbands—especially husbands-..... and friends in every direction, be helpful and sensitive and wise. Remember, “To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven.” 

Mothers, we acknowledge and esteem your faith in every footstep. Please know that it is worth it then, now, and forever." - Jeffery R Holland

I know that I could not do what I do with out the help of the Lord. I know that I need God and my savior Jesus Christ in everything that I do. 

Until next time. Love you C,M,B,C,E, and L.

Eva was proud to show me that she could draw a heart and write our names.

My sweet family

From the kids point of view

From the kids cam

Kids Cam

Kids cam

Kids cam

Kids cam

Winter Blues

So that time of year is upon us. The time when the leaves change colors and fall to the ground. The time when the air gets cool and crisp. That time when everyone is bundled in coats, scarves, and boots. That time of year that I love and at the same time don't love.

I have never been a fan of cold weather. I mean I tolerated it for 10 years while we lived in Colorado. I hated every cold rainy/snowy day. I sat in front of the tv next to the fire place with a hot bowl of soup in my hands. I often would take off to Las Vegas for at least a month during the winter. I get seasonal depression, but in a way I think a lot of people do. When the weather is cold and the skies are gray, that is kind of how I feel inside.

It has been 944 days since I have had to deal with living through an actual winter. That is 2 years and 7 months! Our last 2 winter seasons have been spent in places where "winter" doesn't really exist.  Minus our one week in Colorado and the crazy 24 hour "snowpocalypse" in TX it has been more than 2 1/2 years of perfect weather. What more could you expect from Texas and San Diego in the winter. Sadly my beautiful weather streak is at an end. (I am literally fighting back tears).

Welcome to fall in the North East! Where it seems to always be raining, cloudy, windy and COLD!! I for one am not a fan. Wait the one thing that has been great is watching the colors of the leaves change, but it is a little sad because I know in about a week all that will be left of the beautiful maple trees are ugly naked branches.

The one plus about this weather is the cute clothes. Unfortunately for me I am short and round, and have been cursed with my mother's fat calfs. So the cute layers and the great sweaters only make me look shorter and rounder, and it is nearly impossible to find cute boots in the "wide calf" section, and even if I did find some boots they would make my legs look even shorter.

Today is November 1st, and in line with the past few weeks is has been cold ,windy and rainy.

We had a wonderful Halloween with new friends. A fabulous Ward Fall Festival (for my West coast friends it was inside the building, there was no trunk or treat because our building parking lot has only 8 parking spots).

I will get through this New York City winter by looking forward to each holiday event, that I have always dreamed of attending here in the BIG APPLE!! Up first, The Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade! Then the Christmas Tree Lighting at Rockefeller Center! Then New Years Eve in Time Square! Then the St Patrick's Day Parade!! I will survive this winter from event to event!

Bobby pushing all the kids on the swings!

Our favorite local park.

The kids loved this tiny deer at the Queens zoo.

Lindy

Eva

CJ

Malayna

Bobby 

Snow White and the Poisonous Apple

left to right- Bobby, Eva, Lindy, CJ, and Malayna

Trick or treating with friends. 3 families 15 kids!!

Not like TV

     So we have now been in NYC for few weeks and I am still in a bit of a culture shock. Everything I ever knew about NYC was what I saw on tv and in movies. Let me tell you this, it is NOTHING LIKE TV!!!

     It is a lot dirtier than I thought it would be. I mean the streets, the buildings, and even the air. There is some sort of trash on the ground at all times. The buildings look old and run down and covered in dirt. The air is the worst. After spending anytime walking out side I feel like my skin is dirty. I feel like it is covered in a layer of car exhaust, second hand smoke, and over all pollution. Luckily a hot shower can clear that right up. Not so sure my lungs will ever feel clean again.

     The subway is not as scary as I thought it would be. I pictured dark, damp, cold and creepy. To my pleasant surprise it was the opposite. There is plenty of light, and it is actually warm down there. Most importantly it is not at all creepy. I was surprised by how much the kids and I enjoy riding the subway. It is not an easy system to "get to know" but I am sure by the time we leave we will be old pros. I was shocked by seeing kids ride the subway by themselves, but it turns out that is how they get to and from school. We took the school bus, these kids take the subway.

     The biggest difference from tv  that I have noticed is people here are a lot nicer than what their reputation is. New Yorkers have a reputation for being rude, we all know this. What you didn't know, is that they are really kind and helpful. Example: My mom, the kids and I were headed to Time Sq to do the tourist thing. We got off the subway and didn't know which end we should exit from (there is more that one exit from your stop to street level). We asked some guy which way we should go. Instead of just tell us the way he showed us. Not just showed us but walked us every step of the way. He showed us to the elevator (we had the stroller). He took the stairs up and waited for us to come out of the elevator, then we walked us to the next elevator as he took the stairs. He met us at street level and walked us out to the side walk. He pointed us in the right direction and gave us some tips on how best to navigate through Time Sq. We said our good byes and thank yous. I then watched him walk back into the subway station, from where he had just left to help us. He was such a blessing to us. We have not had any issues where people have been rude or unkind. It has been the complete opposite, they have gone out of there way to be helpful. The only exception to this is when people are driving. They are quick to honk their horn and whip around you if you are driving to slow or not crossing the street fast enough.

     Before we came out here a friend shared this link with me, NYC Tips and Etiquette. It is pretty much right on. I hope by the end of our 9 months here that I can earn the tile of "New Yorker".

Until next time. Love you C,M,B,C,E and L!

   

Our first New York pizza!!

took a picture to know what subway stop we had to
make it back to.

M and B on their first subway ride.

Colt and I on our first subway ride.

The only place I could find to let the kids run around while we
were waiting to for Colt at the doctor in Manhattan, was a cement
"court yard" above a parking garage.

Toll roads everywhere!

My mom excited to be standing kind of close to Nick Lachey in Time Sq!
FYI his arm brushed mine as he left this interview! ;)